


The tragedy of kindness

by The_lie_of_a_dream



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Angst, Character Study, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-10
Updated: 2019-09-10
Packaged: 2020-10-14 02:19:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 387
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20593055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_lie_of_a_dream/pseuds/The_lie_of_a_dream
Summary: Short character study of Akira's perception of Haise, inspired by the hug in the archives and bits of dialogue from the manga.I believe, as much as she wanted to, Akira could not bring herself to hate Haise before he became the black reaper. This looks at why.Excerpt:"She hated the thing Ken Kaneki became. She had no right to care for the thing Haise grew to be.She knew that, but still, but still-"





	The tragedy of kindness

Of all the things that bothered Akira about Haise- his involvement in her fathers death, in amons, the wounds inflicted in his madness- she found the worst thing wasn't the evil in him.

No, it was the goodness.

Haise was just so... so human that sometimes even she forgot what he was. Haise truly loved humans, loved life. Cooking for his squad when he couldn't eat, extending kindness to investigators who spat on him daily, always trying to bring joy into a room. 

There was something terribly moving about it and she hated where it took her thoughts. That if Ken Kaneki hadn't wondered into an alley with a pretty girl one night, well, the man that existed now could have been there all along. 

Could have taken any career he wanted and gotten married, had friends and family. 

Maybe Hide would have been there too, whole and smiling and safe. 

If Kanou had worked in a different ward that night, if Rize chose someone else, if just one thing hadn't led to his being thrust into the darkness... Ken Kaneki could have been the best of them. 

He could have led a beautiful life.

Instead he was here, and death was inscribed in his DNA. No matter what he did, no matter how long he survived, he would eventually be killed by the CCG. That was his reality. 

It did no good to dwell on might haves and would haves. 

It did no good to have pity or sympathy for a ghoul.

She hated the thing Ken Kaneki became. She had no right to care for the thing Haise grew to be. 

She knew that but still, but still-

She goes to the alley the human named Ken had been destroyed in. She leaves a single white lily on the spot where, even with workmen's best efforts, a darkness of blood still remains.

Because despite it all, Haise was a good man. 

Even if he was just a living specter of two lives unlived. The human, and the ghoul. 

She allowed herself to acknowledge the loss this place had seen. 

With a murmured prayer for Kens soul to whatever god cared to listen, Akira left that place of bloodshed and loss.

If tears marked her face, they were lost in the rain, and none would know.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed this, though I am aware it is painfully short. I simply needed to get it out of my system after finally seeing *that* hug in the archives animated. I followed the manga through highschool until it ended but I only just began to watch :RE so all the old emotions are coming back. 
> 
> If you've got this far I'd love to hear your thoughts, again I'm aware it's short so there may be nothing to be said. 
> 
> Adios


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